How important is it to have a supportive family? I’d say it is your back bone to say the least, something you could rely on. Pakistani societies are not ideally known for this but we cannot deny the fact that supportive families do exist.
Mashion’s recent collaboration with Moltyfoam, ‘Mashadi ‘22’ highlighted how a woman decided to step back from an abusive relationship moments before her wedding, but what made it so easy for her to do this? You see the father chimes in and gives a different take to ‘Log kia kahenge’ as he says ‘Log kahaniyan banayege bhi aur sunayege bhi, ke himmat wale maap baap ki bahadur beti ne sab larkion keliye misaal qayam kerdi’
Now do you actually see a father saying this in reality? Be honest. Yes it takes a lot of courage for parents to take a step back because they know our community does a great job when it comes to ridiculing and shaming people who don’t give into this problematic culture; the culture which tweaks the narrative of sabr.
A woman’s entire life is at stake, she is leaving her parents, her siblings, her house, for what? Sabr kerne keliye? And don’t even get me started on aunties telling you ‘Shadi ke baad mard ko aqal ajayegi.’ Fast forward 2 years, they tell you ‘Bacha kerlo, mard ko aqal ajayegi,’ which actually translates to ‘2 lives getting ruined is not thrilling enough so just throw another one in it too.’
We listen and see so many accounts of women committing suicides because their husbands beat them and families refuse to accept them back. We keep chanting, yelling in fact, that a divorced daughter is better than a dead one, but is it working? Families, and the society, should always support a woman walking away from an abusive relationship. It is not a private matter, we want you to intervene and celebrate courage with us.