Only to feel regretful when they’ve passed away

“Jab zinda thay toh aye nahi, jab mar gaye toh janazay pe agaye.” My mother always says: “Kisi ki dil azaari na karo.” Often, it seems that we tend to appreciate and show kindness towards people more when they are no longer with us. We cry out loud at the funerals of the relatives who were way too “toxic” for us. The sisters who didn’t meet for almost 20 years but one of them shows up at the other one’s funeral but beti ki shaadi pe anay se inkaar. When you’re not even ready to celebrate their happiness, you get to shed tears when they’re gone.

It is probably due to a tendency to take people for granted. When someone is alive and present in our lives, we may assume that they will always be there, leading us to prioritize other aspects of our busy lives. just like how we take our parents for granted. First, we were dependent on them, now they are dependent on us. However, we continue to do things our way and ignore them and their feelings. When they pass away, all we can do is shed tears of regret and think to ourselves: “Aakhri baar dahi le he ani chahiye thee ammi k liye.”

We may feel uncomfortable or vulnerable expressing our emotions openly, even if we genuinely appreciate someone’s presence or impact on our lives, and just like that it gets too late to even express one part of your feeling.  Additionally, conflicts, misunderstandings, or disagreements can hinder our ability to be consistently kind and understanding toward our special ones.

Ultimately, it is within our control to be mindful of the way we treat others and to make a conscious effort to show kindness, love, and appreciation to the people in our lives while they are still here kuinkey agar dair hogayi phir ronay ka koi faida nahi.


Hi! I'm an occasional reader, an avid writer and a fiercely firm feminist too. Hope you read & like my articles. I don't do politics much but I love writing for women, culture & life!